"My Supports"

Daily Support Factors- My husband is the biggest support system in my life. He helps me with day to day tasks with our children, our home, our finances, and our entire life. My life would be drastically different without him. Raising three young children without their father would be very difficult to do by myself. As my husband is the major bread wintner in our household, we would probably have to downsize our home and I would need to take a second job. Without him, my children and myself would be deeply saddened and miss him greatly. Truly, I don't know if I could handle raising three young children, working full-time and handling all that our life brings us without him. It would be the end of the wonderful life that we now know.

Friends- I am fortunate enough to have some incredible friends in my life. Most of my close friends have been a part of my life for many years. I have remained close to two of my friends from high school I also have three very close friends from the school where I taught. A couple of my friends, I have known for less than five years, but they are a true inspiration to me and I enjoy their company greatly. Without my friends, my life would seem somewhat lacking. There are times when I need to vent or just get away from the day to day tasks. One of the things I enjoy most, other than my family is spending time with my close friends. Sometimes, I go out with my girlfriends for a night of just "letting go". These are relaxing and enjoyable times for me. If I need to confide in someone or ask for advice, several of my friends are trustworthy enough to share private information. My life would seem lonely without my friends.

Iphone- I have an extremely busy life and without my iphone, I would be completely lost. My iphone is used for making calls, texting, using the internet, making mulitple lists, setting my calender for appointments, tasks, meetings etc. I use my phone as a camera, map directory, Facebook, watch my weight, as a watch, check my emails and many many more things. I really cannot imagine my life without it. There have been a few times where I have traveled to parts of the world where my phone would not work. Without a phone, I was able to manage, but it was only for a short amount of time. My iphone holds so many "hats", it has replaced many various tasks I used to do before I had it. Sometimes when I get too overwhelmed, I turn my phone off. Without a phone for a short time is a postitive, but without a phone permanetly would mean added work and stress for me.

Computer- My computer is another item I would have a difficult time living without. I use it for school, work, my business, my children use it for homework, to play games and my husband uses it for emails and for his business. I grew up without a computer, and managed just fine. However, now that I have become used to using it, life would be difficult without it. There are just too many things I depend on my computer for.

My Housekeeper- Theresa is someone that I value very much in my busy life. She is the one who comes in on a weekly basis to clean my bathrooms, mop my floors and change sheets, and just do the tasks that I honestly do not have time to do in my life right now. I work full-time, raising 3 young children, attending Graduate School, have a very active online business, my children are in football, chess club, dance, guitar lessons, and swimteam right now. My husband and I also teach a children's class at our church on Sundays. Personally, I can manage most of the housework, but without Theresa it would be much harder. If Theresa did not come on a weekly basis, my house would not get cleaned as often. The bathrooms, floors and sheets would not be cleaned until I had time to do it. This could be unsanitary and unhealthy to my family. I greatly appreciate her and make personal financial sacrifices to afford her.

Imagining myself with a physical disability in which I had to use a wheelchair to get around, my life would be incredibly different. I'm positive my husband and friends would still be a very strong and important part of my life. However, trying to manage a household with three young children would be very challenging. Our house features the bedrooms on the second floor with no adaptations for someone in a wheelchair. We would either have to sell our house and move, or make some major changes to our current home. Our house is surrounded by a courtyard with steps at all of our entrances. We also live on the side of a mountain with a rugged 3 mile drive up to our house. Most likely, our current house would not be practical for me to live in. Our vehicles would have to be changed as well. We have several large animals such as our 175 lb. African Sulcata Tortoise. At this point, I would not be able to access his habitat, as there is a gate with stairs going down to get to where he lives. Again, the place where we live would not be practical for someone in a wheelchair. I'm sure I could learn to drive and manage getting my children from one sport to another. However, it would take much more time and effort. There is very little extra time in our lives right now, so it would mean a complete life change for our entire family.
Physically- I'm sure I would need to receive some type of therapy, and doctors more often. This would impact my job, my lifestyle and my family. Our family spends our downtime riding dirt bikes and hiking. Again, our lifestyle would have to be adjusted.
Emotionally- If I had to be in a wheelchair now after spending most of my life in a very active and physical lifestyle, it would be very emotionally upsetting for me. I tend to be more on the "high-stung" and super active type of personality. It would take many adjustments for me to learn how to slow-down and live a more seditary lifestyle.

"My Connections to Play"

"We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing".
-George Bernard Shaw


"Play gives children a chance to practice what they are learning...They have to play with what they know to be true in order to find out more, and then they can use what they learn in new forms of play." -Fred Rogers 9Mr. Rogers' neighborhood)

Essential play items for myself as a child were dirt and the outdoors. Growing up in the seventies in southern Arizona, I spent most of my days playing outside either with myself, siblings or the neighborhood children. We lived in a small town surrounded by desert and numerous warm days. It was a time when parents had few concerns about letting their young children roam freely around the neighborhood. It was not uncommon to ride your bike down the street, walk to a nearby store or play hide-in-go-seek with most of the children that lived on your street. I remember having sleep-overs in the backyard, building forts in the nearby desert, and playing games in each other's yards. When a parent needed to call a child to come home, they would just stand in their yard and call out their name. Someone in the neighborhood would know where "so and so" was playing and get word to them that their mother was calling them home.
It was truly a time when children were allowed to have large amounts of unrestricted playtime. I literally remember finishing my chores in the morning and running outside to play. We would spend the entire day outside and come back in starving and dirty just as it was getting dark. After dinner and bath, we passed out from exhaustion that was brought on by all the physical activity we had enjoyed all day long.

Today play for most young children is very different than how it was when I was growing up. Despite research showing how important free-play is to the overall development of young children, free-play has been greatly reduced due to many factors. Children may be raised in a family where both parents work, or from a single-parent family where there is little time left in the day for unrestricted play. Others may been too involved in structed sports, or clubs. Still others may live in areas that are too dangerous for children to be left unattended (Ginsberg, 2007).

Play and downtime have been an important part of my life both as a young person and now as a parent of young children. It is so easy to get caught up in a hurried lifestyle, especially these days. However, a life with too much structure and little freetime, leads to increased stress and depression (Ginsberg, 2007). My husband and I can always tell when our children have had too much of anything and need to decompress or just "chill". We have made it a point to not "over-schedule" our children's lives, in order for them to have time to just enjoy being a kid. As a family we try to keep the joy of not taking oneself too seriously alive, and to enjoy the simple things in life (Almon, 2002). Just this afternoon, I was having tea with my four-year old and our dog (who was dressed in a tutu), and my six-year old was battleing several dragons that were attempting to enter his castle.

References

Almon, K. (2002). The vital role of play in early childhood education. Gateways, 43. Retrieved from http://www.waldorflibrary.org/Journal Articles/GW43almon.pdf

Ginsberg, K. (2007). The importance of play in promoting healthy development and maintaining strong parent-child bonds. Pediatrics, 119(1), 182-191. Retrieved from hppt://www.aap.org/pressroom/playfinal.pdf

Relationship Reflection

This space on my blog is dedicated to my family. Pictured in this photo is my husband, myself and our four children-Taylor, Rocco, Jack & Christine. My family means everything to me. We are a very close family that support each other, and make daily efforts to show how much we cherish and value each other as individuals and also as a family unit. Personally, I make sure my children hear everyday, how much I love and cherish them. My husband and I are truly a team, trying to raise our children to be thoughtful, thankful, and caring individuals. We encourage our children to do their best, but also understand we all make mistakes. When mistakes happen, it's just one of life's ways of telling us to try it another way and keep going. I never take for granted all that has been given to me-a supportive and loving husband, four beautiful, healthy and happy children, a wonderful place to live and loyal and supportive friends.

Starting relationships with others is usually fairly easy. It's maintainin those relationships that take time and work on part sides. For instance, when I met my husband it was easy to get to know him. We met on a beautiful beach in the Virgin Islands many years ago. He was playing croquet on the beach and I was enjoying a frozen drink with my sister. I was down in the islands running a summer camp program. He was down there having fun for the summer. We spent our days playing on the beach, exploring the islands and just enjoying everything life had to offer. The following year, we were married and the reality of life and having to work harder to maintain and expand on our relationship began. It was not long before we realized the carefree life of the "summer romance", was just a distant memory. We spent the next few years, learning how to enjoy each other, without the daily trips to the beach and nightly visits to the local clubs.

It was not long before the new mortgage began, and the babies started arriving. It was at this time our relationship, went from two newlyweds, to new parents struggling to get by with little sleep and more bills to pay, and even less time to think about those long lazy beach days and frozen drinks of days long gone.

 Currently, we are in the "just beginning to rise out of the trenches" stage of our lives. Our youngest child will be starting school next year. I'm finishing up graduate school, with hopes of bringing more income to the family, but also working more hours in the near future.
Through it all, my husband and I have learned to lean on each other. Of course we have had our differences and always will. However, we have grown to respect each other in many ways. We value each other's opinion, support each other and cherish our time together. I know I could not be the parent I am without my partner, my husband. Our extended families do not live close by, therefore we are literally raising these children without any outside help. However, we seem to really "get it". The evidence is clear in how happy and well-adjusted our children are. They are polite and mannerly and seem to love my husband and I very much. Of couse, we all have our moments, but we all know and feel the love and care we have for each other. This support has helped us through some trying times, and will continue to do so as our road to life continues.
My close relationship with my family has and will continue to impact my work as an effective early childhood professional. Everyday, I begin my day with a prayer thanking God for my family and my blessings. I also ask for guidance in helping me to be the best teacher I can be. It's important to me that I have a postive impact on every young child I work with. During these critical formative years, I have learned through my postive relationships, how important it is to really listen and show compassion to all those around me. Every child has something positive to offer the world, and it is my job to help bring out those passions and dreams.

Tutu Garden